My Inner Monologue

National Blog Posting Month – March 2014 – Self

Prompt – How is your writing voice like you? How does your writing voice differ from you?

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I have a voice. I have the one that I use when lecturing to my classes, or when telling my son to stop jumping on his bed. Then I have my inner voice, the one that narrates my inner monologue. My inner voice is quite eloquent. My spoken voice is frequently, er, full of fail.

The way I write is the way my mind works when I’m thinking. It is my inner voice.

Alas, when I’m speaking, it seldom comes out the same way.

When I’m thinking, I don’t stammer over words. In fact, as I think about it, I skip whole phases by simply knowing what I mean to say. An image or action suffices when you have it in your head. But to come up with descriptive words… now there’s a different story.

I find that when I speak, unless what I’m saying is carefully rehearsed, I stutter and stumble. I often feel like it comes out as garbage. It’s frustrating.

I’m the queen of ‘Oh, I shoulda said that!’

Maybe that’s why I shy away from using the phone, like, ever. ‘Cause you never know when strange noises might erupt from my mouth.

My writing voice is what I wish my spoken voice is like. Sadly, nearly every time I open my mouth, I remind myself again that it is a far-fetched hope.