I’m a paleontologist. I’m a little selective about dinosaur toys… understandably. So when I saw this toy set at the drug store yesterday, I had to buy it – if only to protect unsuspecting children from buying it and thinking its contents really represented actual dinosaurs.
The dinosaurs inside look pretty… exciting.
Let’s take a closer look at these purported ‘dinosaurs.’
Two for two. Looking good for actually having dinosaurs in the box.
Three for three.
Well, this animal is mostly dinosaur-y. But no dinosaur has external ears. But I’ll just overlook that for now…
Birds are dinosaurs. Archaeopteryx is a dinosaur. But pterosaurs are not dinosaurs. Not even close…
Uh.
Even I know that dragons aren’t dinosaurs. Sheesh.
I can understand how Dimetrodon can end up in a box of dinosaurs. But this is obviously a mammal. Someone ought to be fired.
Uh, yeah. Guys. That’s another mammal.
And here is a Dungeons and Dragons critter called Bulette. Yeah. Not a dinosaur.
Oh, come on! You’re not even trying! This ain’t no dinosaur!
I hope my public service is appreciated. Alas, I suspect some kid is going to be disappointed that he didn’t get the realistic dinosaurs set of his or her birthday. I’m a terrible person.
Penny Higgins - Storyteller • Artist • Scientist 