The holidays are always a little strange around our household. There are several reasons for us to dislike the holidays, and if you already know me well, you know some of the big ones. For one thing, both my husband and I don’t buy into the whole religiosity of the season, so we wind up trying to make it a celebration of the solstice, which, in truth is worth celebrating. Usually about this time of year I’m cursing the short days. BRING BACK MY DAYLIGHT! But that’s a tough sell to the boy and the rest of the family, and to the community at large.
What troubles me most about the holidays these days is the materialism of the whole Christmas thing and that usually it involves me having to deal with members of my family that I’d rather not deal with. It seems that I am endlessly trying to make the Christmas holiday something that we – in our small family group of Mommy, Daddy, and Boy – can all celebrate together, that is a fitting celebration of the season, and not some gross get-as-much-stuff-as-you-can and jam-your-family-down-your-throat event that serves no useful purpose. I go through cycles of complete disinterest in the holiday, where none of the decorations go up and the gift-giving is pretty meager. The only reason why gift-giving occurs at all in those years is due to pressure from the rest of the family. Other years, I go crazy with all the decorating and really get into it, only to discover it was a lot of work and little return. (The boy gets his toys. The extended family whines more than I want to hear. I get to clean up .)
This year is shaping up to be one of those indifferent years. I find that I’m not even trying, despite the excited pleas of the boy to put up the decorations and the tree. I suppose the tree will ultimately go up. The M-I-L will most likely be at our house for Christmas, so I’ll be obligated. (And don’t say ‘It’s your house. Do what you want.’ It don’t work like that.) *sigh*
There is one thing that I want to try to do this year. I read the idea here. The idea is that rather than having an Advent calendar to count down the days, why not give the boy a book each day? I’ve bought him a bunch of new books, some are age-appropriate novels, some are activity books, others are Christmas themed. I’ll scrounge around for some older books that we already have to round out the collection of 24 books needed for the Christmas count down. My hope is that the boy will enjoy getting a new book every day. My hope is also that I’ll find the time to read or do something with him every day as well. So far it’s not looking so good, but this is a first attempt. We’ll see.
But other than this, I am completely apathetic about the holidays this year. I could use some help getting motivated. Or maybe I just need someone to tell me that my indifference is perfectly OK. I’m open to suggestions. Does anyone else have thoughts about how to get the family more involved and interested in the holiday? Maybe something that involves them doing something and not just me? Anyone? Anything? Maybe I’ll just go to bed.
Penny Higgins - Storyteller • Artist • Scientist 
Well, we are some of the odiously religious Christmas celebrants, but our enthusiasm for the trappings waxes and wanes anyway… We like lights so those go up (inside at least) most years, but pre-kids that was about it. We have only a modest amount of family drama, but Jen has a LOT of extended family and we run out of energy/creativity for mass gifting pretty fast. Starts out as a “opportunity to re-connect” and ends up as an obligatory newsletter of extreme cheese. Which never makes it to the post office. But no one has disowned us (yet) as far as we know….
With kids in-house the gift part is fun while they are still in the anything-new-is-good phase. (Really like the 24 days of books idea! We have some boxed we need to pull up now that they can read “real” books a little better…) We’re trying to steer the Higglets towards more thoughtful giving by having them create stuff for the fam instead of just taking them to the dollar store. We’ve convinced the (8-yr-old) twins to work together on a “book” and board game and the 6-yr-old has finally coughed up a (relatively) non-violent story to illustrate for the Grandparents. The 4-yr-old will probably get to finger paint since we don’t want to mail her other preferred creative outlet – playdough.
Another idea for when the kids start getting a little pocket change is something their school class did last year – they went through “Heifer International” to buy livestock for families in developing nations. (It was a Very big debate in the class on whether to go with a goat or pig and rabbits or ducklings).
In trying to countering the commercialism of the season, we tend to highlight some specifics of the Nativity — the little dude was born in a barn, not a window display; grew up a carpenter’s son (not a merchant); was known for being kind to people in distress (even if they were unpleasant or unpopular); and for encouraging people to treat each other well (even when they didn’t “like” him back). There is value to be found just in those aspects of the tradition regardless of more complicated beliefs about Jesus of Nazareth as a historical or religious figure.
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Thanks for this, MattNJen. I’m glad I’m not alone in the waxing and waning bit. You have some good suggestions here… Let’s see if I can get motivated now!
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I think one of the worst things about Christmas is having to deal with family that you would just rather have the world stop and let off. In recent years my husband , kids, and I keep to ourselves on Christmas and it is more enjoyable that way. By deleting all the drama that family I would rather forget loves to inject, Christmas has become merrier than I could have ever imagined it to be.
Kathy
http://gigglingtruckerswife.blogspot.com
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